there once was a girl from nantucket dirty jokes

ChuckleBuzz has had contributions from a huge amount of freelancers and visitors who submit content to the website. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it! LOL LOL hahahaha these limericks are priceless. But his daughter, named Nan, If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it! Funny stuff! He tried to ID em Nell Rose (author) from England on March 09, 2012: Thanks Lee, really funny! Youll be spitting out some poetry while your friends are spitting out laughs. Female versionThere once was a girl from Nantucket. There once was a man from Nantucket,Whose cock was so long he could suck it,Said he with a grin,As he wiped off his chin,If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it! So, as I was in a particularly funny mood, I thought that I would add a few of my favourites here. I wrote one recently that has gone missing, and I wish I could find it. I didn't know that Lear was an artist too, a man of many talents! Here's a Limerick that I heard in college from a music major. Chicago Tribune %PDF-1.5 % It took a lot of searching all over the place, but I love them, don't you? An amoeba named Max and his brother / Were sharing a drink with each other; / In the midst of their quaffing, / They split themselves laughing, / And each of them now is a mother. Interestingly enough, I find the first batch of limericks a lot more entertaining than Lear's may I open my eye now?? These are so funny. There once was a lady from Venus Who's body was shaped like a penis When First Contact was made The crew were dismayed When she told them her species and genus Whoa, did you just write that now? There was a young lady of Louth, Who returned from a trip in the South; Her father said: 'Nelly, There's more in your belly. Your limericks are humorous and smart and just the right amount of naughty. and see Mhatter99 too. [1] There once was a man from Nantucket. thought he'd take a quick bath in a bucket. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were . Who had one so long he could suck it. Nell Rose (author) from England on March 17, 2014: Hi Crystal, lol! There once was a man from Nantucket / Who kept all his cash in a bucket / His daughter, named Nan / Ran away with a man / And as for the bucket, Nantucket. Thanks for the post. Well it is pretty simple really. And sparks fly out of his ass! Its a story of a blessed man and his carefree attitude to life. "There once was a man from Nantucket," Cruz tweeted, linking to a story about Biden's plan to spend Thanksgiving on Nantucket, a tiny island off the coast of Massachusetts. In a handwoven Nantucket Basket. Lear, who was born in1812, was all about a bit of funand wrotehis Book of Nonsense of 72 limericks in 1846 with exactly that in mind. After national outcry, Cruz returned early and . Nell Rose (author) from England on May 02, 2011: Hi, vietnamvet, thanks so much, glad you liked them, cheers nell. When using the limerick as X-rated humor, you pick words that rhyme with bucket.. lol yeah I like the sally one too, just about right, but I think Edward Lear needed to take a few more poetry lessons!! Let's say you were trapped inside this room. / If I put my mind to it / Im sure I can do it. There once was a girl named Irene / Who lived on distilled kerosene / But she started absorbing / A new hydrocarbon / And since then has never benzene. This is understandably a very popular hub. Funny Limericks: They Can Be Hard to Find! Or you could try some of these funny poems instead. If its money you need, I dont lack it. There was a young lady from Vanvaper, But failed and in wrath cried Aw shuck it! I told you it's my job to suck it! There was a young maid from Madras 10 Fucking Limericks -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it. "There once was a man from Nantucket" is the opening line for many limericks, in which the name of the island of Nantucket creates often ribald rhymes and puns. she said with a grin, wipe that cum from your chin. Which of course is all of you! There once was a man from Nantucket, glad it made you laugh! And when she got there, (B) Da da dum da da dum thanks so much for reading, cheers nell. He won my heart, they are funny aren't they? Who had a magnificent ass; Which itself is based on a poem about a man with a strange choice of wallet. A long time ago meaning | Common English Idioms #shorts. Ran away with a man, Knock Knock Who's there! / He set out one day / In a relative way / And returned on the previous night. Voted up and across and thanks for the entertainment. Required fields are marked *. and the doctor says "well how did it get there" and she says "I was doing my Jane Gill-Shaler, North Carolina, The man built their home in Alaska, To claim it by law But Pa still owns land At the local museum If my ear was a hole I would fuck it! thanks so much for reading, nell. -- maybe not as funny as the 5,000+ jokes here, but I ramble about life, technology and other things that make The limerick is a humorous five-line poem with two rhymes: one shared by the first, second, and fifth lines, and the other shared by the shorter third and fourth lines. Fortune: 369 - 378 of 860 from Freebsd Limericks. There once was a girl in Milan, New fashions she liked to put on. Who went for a ride in a rocket An oyster from Kalamazoo / Confessed he was feeling quite blue. Ahem. I can always count on you, Nell! John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes. The opening line is so well known that it has been used as a stand-alone joke . yes limericks are hard to write, but fun though! Nell Rose (author) from England on August 22, 2010: Hi, raisingme, I was going to get ruder then I thought better of it! Just need some Irish beer. sorry it took so long to answer, I seem to be running around like a mad woman these last few days! lol! lol! She said, "It's a sin, But now that it's in, Could you shove it a few inches higher? Linda Bilyeu from Orlando, FL on August 24, 2012: Nell Rose (author) from England on June 09, 2012: Hi tony, glad you liked it! Oh wait a minute; I just remembered that I don't frequent pubs. But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man And as for the bucket, Nantucket! Nell Rose (author) from England on April 29, 2012: Hi Larry, haha! He said with a grin, while wiping his chin. His daughter, named Nan, Ran off with a man, And as for the bucketNan took it. The exact origin of this limerick remains unknown. For he told a fat girl she was skinny! All of are parties were bawdy and limericks were a fixture that induced competition and mixed well with the mud, the blood and the beer. Then, it was based upon a well-endowed man. Good judgment and tacked, When Nan and her man Ran away with a man. If you prefer something with less than five lines, try these hilarious one-liners. There was a Young Man from Kent Non-Linear Lines from Alberta, Canada on February 01, 2011: Thanks for the giggle! Far be it for royalty such as myself to reject a challenge! Voted up. A crafty young bard named McMahon / Whose poetry never would scan / Once said, with a pause, / Its probably because / Im always trying to cram as many additional syllables into the last line as I possibly can.. lol thanks nell. He said with a grin You certainly know how to put the words together to make witty tales! I am going to forward this to my brother-in-law, 'cause I know he will get a kick out of it! When the owner saw Pa Madeline Begun Kane aka Mad Kane Trump the Game Plan by Michael R. Burch aka "The Loyal Opposition" There once was a huckster named Trump who liked to be kissed on the rump. lol! Sooo Shorry, too much tooo drinkkkkkk! But his daughter named Nan, ha ha thanks so much for making me laugh! Who kept all his cash in a bucket. There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. My favorite ones have always been about the little boy Willy: Hi, ACSutliff, thanks for liking it, I was going to make it a bit ruder then I thought, no don't push my luck! cheers nell. Cruz responded by reciting the opening line of an infamous dirty limerick that utilizes certain phrases which rhyme with "Nantucket." Earlier this year, as Cruz's state of Texas faced devastating winter storms that decimated its independent power grid, the Senator flew to sunny Cancn, Mexico as hundreds of his constituents froze to death. Al Gini, Loyola University Chicago . And as for the bucket, Nantucket. Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) responded to President Joe Biden's Thanksgiving plans with the first line of a limerick, and Twitter users thought it was a poetic self-own. lol! The tweet is. Thanks for the fun. There was a lewd whore from Nantucket who intended to pee in a bucket; but being a man she missed the damn can and her rattled johns fled, crying: "Fuck it!" Variation on a classic limerick by Michael R. Burch Here's another bawdy Nantucket limerick, author unknown: There once was a man from Nantucket Whose schlong was so long he could sucket There once was a man From Nantucket who was not In a limerick. Suzette Walker from Taos, NM on September 01, 2011: These are great! And I had never heard a one of these before. There once was a man from Bel Air Who was doing his wife on the stair But the banister broke So he doubled his stroke And finished her off in mid-air. Thanks for reading. I have looked everywhere for the photo, but this was before we were told to add links, and I wish I had now, I think, If I remember right, that I put in google search something like tavern wench, but I am not sure, sorry, I will take another look because its driving me mad now! / But how is the sage / To discern from this page: / Was it piglets, or seeds, that were sowing? and its great to hear some new ones. I'll try to add one here but it is quite rude so I will edit out one of the words. Who gave me his Nantucket Bucket, Nell Rose (author) from England on November 30, 2012: Thanks owner, glad you liked it, and I love your little limerick! Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair. Nell Rose (author) from England on October 23, 2015: lol! Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. thanks again, nell. Nell Rose (author) from England on August 19, 2010: Hi, pmc, lol glad you like them, I did have a few more, but they were, well a bit more rude! Theyd clack together, Please delete comment if too rude for your hub. A wonderful bird is the pelican / His bill holds more than his belican / He can take in his beak / Enough food for a week / But Im damned if I see how the helican. Nell Rose (author) from England on May 11, 2012: Hi Sue, lol! Besides Iowa, read up on the funniest jokes about all 50 states. Most people assume that poetry is a part of elitist culture. 91 Rush Elkins Retired Rocket Scientist Author has 1.2K answers and 873.2K answer views Updated 3 y Related What's the best mathematical limerick you've ever heard? You've got the whitest teeth I've ever come across. Not rounded and pink, The limerick where the line is from was first written for the Princeton Tiger in 1902. ha ha cheers nell. Here's one my mother used to recite--it may be from Lear, but I'm not certain: Nell Rose (author) from England on December 10, 2015: LOL! Great tufts of fine grass There are dozens of examples of rhyming the last word in the limerick. thanks for reading, I am having trouble with my pc at the moment and have also been busy with my brother, I just can't get on here enough these days, but thats gonna change! There once was a man from Nantucket would turn into a staple of American humor, featuring on TV shows like The Simpsons, Suits, Hey Arnold! thanks for reading, nell. Read up on even more bad jokes youll just have to laugh at. Heres one from me hope you find it funny.. Once was a dog with hind leg missing, These are Guaranteed to Make You Smile. ----- There once was a . All three of the A lines must rhyme with each other, and the two B lines must also rhyme with each other. He said to his girl However, I did not know about its root. This is the sort of funny limerick Einstein might come up with! I really enjoyed your hub, thank you for sharing. John Hansen from Australia (Gondwana Land) on December 09, 2015: Hi Nell, I know I am five years late, but i just came across this hub and I love limericks. But the money he earned, Mantucket Larry Fields from Northern California on April 28, 2012: Voted up, funny, and shared. Because the limerick is such a flexible form of verse, limericks for kids can be just as funny as clever limericks. and took the motto of Philli, "limericks can be traced back in history", but noting for me, cause i'd piss a streak, as in 'limericks' not so naughty, i know, my might and arms are night sticks, they glow. Required fields are marked *, Phrases Similar to There Once was a Girl from Nantucket, Phrases Opposite to There Once was a Girl from Nantucket, Ways People May Say There Once was a Girl from Nantucket Incorrectly, Acceptable Ways to Phrase There Once was a Girl from Nantucket. Therefore, its best to use it in environments where you arent offending other people around you. Along came his wife, However, the limerick is the common mans version of poetry. 0 Tami Martinex, Playa Del Rey, CA, The theft had the whole Island reeling, 10 Fucking Limericks ----- There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it. There once was a girl in the choir / Whose voice rose up hoir and hoir, / Till it reached such a height / It went clear out of seight, / And they found it next day in the spoir. Nantucket is in fact a real place, based in Massachusetts, USA. 0 coins. From my plentiful stash, It was winter, alas. What an entertaining hub you wrote. You can have six inches more! Rob Keister, Fountain Valley, CA, Why all the fuss bout this bucket? Has rendered him nutless, Freebsd Limericks: 370 of 860. There once was a man from Bel Air Once youre done chuckling at these funny limericks, check out these anti-jokes you cant help but laugh at anyway. Other publications seized upon the "Nantucket" motif, spawning many sequels. Perhaps the most infamous limerick of all, "There once was a man from Nantucket," though not a drinking song, was published in 1902 in an issue of the Princeton Tiger, the university's humor . Demas W Jasper from Today's America and The World Beyond on April 04, 2020: Good response, Paula, but you have done even better, as Nell will probably attest. It is believed that limericks date back to the 14th century and originated in the Irish town of Limerick. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. Nell Rose (author) from England on April 02, 2020: Sankhajit Bhattacharjee from MILWAUKEE on April 01, 2020: Nell Rose (author) from England on July 09, 2017: LOL! There was a young girl of Cape Cod We are sorry for Nan, 490 0 obj <>/Filter/FlateDecode/ID[<8AF3270EBB3E184A91C3DFB6F9A888EE><1D479E6B4C6B4345AB21D263EB0D7E10>]/Index[469 39]/Info 468 0 R/Length 102/Prev 189081/Root 470 0 R/Size 508/Type/XRef/W[1 3 1]>>stream There once was a girl named Irene / Who lived on distilled kerosene / But she started absorbing / A new hydrocarbon / And since then has never benzene. Alas, the bucket was found He bought bees with the money, I've built a little API-as-a-Service platform that makes it easy to create an API and deploy it to a private cloud. Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, If you like mysteries, psychic phenomena, true stories or just a good laugh, please feel free to click on my Profile page, the link is below, it would be great to see you. It's a story of a blessed man and his carefree attitude to life. We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man . They are funny, but they can be a good lullabye. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Thanks to those who have contributed theirs, more are always welcome a they are very good. Great stuff! There was no need for your man to jack it. " There once was a man from Nantucket " is the first line in many limericks. Limericks should have five lines that follow the rhythm in the examples below.) Another great hub, my dear! So to save himself trouble I feel like writing a few myself. Flowed out of his rectum, To check on a bird yep I know the one WP! Send the limericks to us at P.O. A few years ago, Yesterdays Island began to encourage readers to continue the saga. Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, hbbd```b``3+dE4A$09L And offer to settle; Peter Chubb, Aldeburgh, Suffolk, England, Pa went back to Nantucket, And decided to toss the bucket, Or is that the "official" continuation of it? There was a dear lady of Eden, / Who on apples was quite fond of feedin; / She gave one to Adam, / Who said, Thank you, Madam, / And then both skedaddled from Eden. An insomniac young fellow named Hatches Took a room in a whorehouse in Natchez He still tossed and turned half the night, but he learned How to manage by sleeping in snatches. 'Nantucket Man is all of us' "The man in Nantucket who gave Joe Biden the middle finger today has a higher approval rating than Joe Biden," one person joked. Alan Reber, Arizona, She returned with no more than a ducat According to language experts, the use of the limerick extends back to the late 18th century. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. Who had ears of different sizes But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. His nuts were made out of brass, Cash flows through my bucket, a sieve. (B) Da da dum da da dum There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket He has a daughter named Nan Who ran away with a man And as for the bucket, Nan tuck it romulusnr 7 yr. ago I DVed but then found out that you might be right. Nell Rose (author) from England on May 19, 2011: Hi, Thatguypk, lol brilliant! There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, But his daughter named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket Nan took it! Poor old Nan and the man in Alaska. As he wiped off his chin, if my mouth was a cunt I could fuck it. Is algebra fruitless endeavor? A chap who lived in New Guinea, The dirty, old man from Nantucket. All combined it adds up to all the great content you see! thanks! We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. Who swallowed some samples of paint, in stormy weather, he'd clack them together, and lightning shot out of his ass. There once was a girl named Louise Who peed whenever she sneezed. Audrey Howitt from California on March 17, 2014: Nell Rose (author) from England on January 04, 2013: Hi teaches, lol! There was a young lady whose chin / Resembled the point of a pin / So she had it made sharp / And purchased a harp / And played several tunes with her chin. Bill Briggs, Tusseyville, PA. Before Nan lifted that cash and bucket Manage Settings There was a young fellow of Crete / Who was so exceedingly neat / When he got out of bed / He stood on his head / To make sure of not soiling his feet. Lets unpack it for you in this post. / Said the two to the tutor, / Is it harder to toot, or / To tutor two tooters to toot?, A rather disgruntled young Viking / Found plunder was not to his liking / When they yelled All ashore, / He just threw down his oar / And announced, Im not striking, Im striking!. Hi Nell, one of my hubber friends, kallini2010, just sent me a link to this hub of yours. Oh, and how I needed all the smiles youve given me in here. It is often used for rhyming as the name fits a number of words. Merry Meet My Friends here's to the Ale and the Bawdiness! / Said the fly, Let us flee! / Let us fly! said the flea / So they flew through a flaw in the flue. But that leaves a question now, dont it? And quick as a mouse, Whether this is true or not, they have certainly been vulgarised today. A relative way, get it? I do wish I could write limericks. Sprouted out of his ass Stole the money and ran, And I do mean years because, while I recognized some, others I wasn't 'exposed' to in school nor were my children. We have more brie-lliant cheese puns where this came from! but I love the little ditty! And practically useless on dates. There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out of brass. Cheers. Hed both seen and heard; This got her pants wet, Which made her upset, And when it was cold she would freeze. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. Ron U. Austin, TX 826 friends 768 reviews An elderly man comes in to see his Doctor. Did she think on that bucket :)))) (fab. Report as inappropriate 11/26/2017 This Yelper's account has been closed. Whose balls were made of brass LOL! Printer Friendly | Permalink | | Top Twitter users have trolled Republican Texas Senator Ted Cruz after he referenced a dirty limerick poem in relation to the upcoming travels of Democratic President Joe Biden. Nell Rose (author) from England on November 24, 2010: Hi, saleheen, I am so glad you found it amusing, it is good when you can have a laugh, especially if you are feeling down, thanks so much nell. Even though I'm not a poetry buff, I did feel obligated to contribute to the genre, because of all the great Limericks out there. And the cash that it held caused a row, The specific origin of the limerick is unknown, likely spoken between ancestral friends long before ever being written down.

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